Scum Bag

Scum Bag

Stand there until your sober.

[	Clam Shack	\|	My Scumspace.	]
[	Spleesh	\|	Where is my mind?	]
[	Cramps	\|	Forever?	]
[	Sharp Shooter	\|	Texas	]
[	Bastards	\|	Holy Hardcore	]
[	Guts	\|	Bonk!?	]

shine more

[Nov. 6th, 2006|02:35 am]

[	Current Mood	\|	curious	]
[	Current Music	\|	pwt	]

i hope im getting things right this time...

i hope im really as happy as i think i am. i really should take sometime by myself thinking. I'm so disconnected. put one foot in front of the other, get my life in order.

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kinda true, kinda freaky.

[Jul. 28th, 2006|04:08 pm]

[	Current Mood	\|	okay	]
[	Current Music	\|	alk3	]

phsyic reading last night.

-depression runs in my family.
-i've been depressed on and off for the last 4 years.
-i can predict things with my dreams
-i can tell a persons energy right when i meet them.
-i need to keep writing down my dreams, its a huge part of my life.
-i'm closer with guys then girls
-i recently got out of a serious relationship and had my heart broken
-that relationship isn't over
-in two years i'm going to fall in love with my bestfriend and find happiness.

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old dead milkmen crap	[Jul. 25th, 2006\|11:00 am]
Every night i listen to music while reading lyrics. I'm trying to find the meaning of my life in a song. If I ever find that song, I'll never let it go. i found this too...
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Remembering Change

[Jul. 25th, 2006|10:56 am]

[

Current Mood

hopeful

]

I was looking back at something i wrote in febuary. It really put things into perspective for me.

"don't let the forest grow over that path you came there by.

Sitting here having yet another sleepless night, my mind goes wild in thought and realization. I’m thinking about how much I’ve change since I started high school. I was ready to give up on education, family, love, and life. Sometime in August of 03’ was it? Bishop Verot High School. Its almost unreal to think I’m the same person. But I can’t even say I am, because I’m not at all. I have the same name, social security number, and birth certificate, yes this all is true, but there is no way in hell that I am the same person I was freshman year. I used to look at change and take it as something horrible and honestly frightful, but for the first time I’m confident enough to put it in words that I’m okay with change. Change is the very producer of life. You can’t honestly say your living your life unless you introduce such changes to it every “now and then”. And yes, a lousy fucking handful of this “change” is detestable to say the very least, but its what makes us human. The basis of life is connected to mere dynamics. You love, you loose, you gain, you stumble, you get up, you fall, get up, and fall again even harder… its life. And to give up on it, isn’t just showing that you are giving up on yourself, its letting every enemy you have know that they defeated you. Its letting everyone that cares for you down. And all because of change. A word that rolls of a tongue as its nothing, but realistically its everything. Something that can be explained so easily yet its true affects can’t be viewed as anything but catastrophic yet nativity. Its quiet astounding when truly given a fair amount of thought. But it is what it is. And once accepted, it feels a burden is perhaps, lifted. I’ve changed for the better. And as I say that with dignity, I'll never forget who I was, where I came from,what I went through or what once was. "

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Booze not Bombs!

[Jul. 25th, 2006|09:56 am]

[	Current Location	\|	kitchen	]
[	Current Mood	\|	listless	]
[	Current Music	\|	Rumbleseat- Moonshiner<3	]

So I'm looking up Folk Punk Bands. So far I've found the following.
- Bread & Roses
- Evan Greer
- Joshua Faulkner♥
- Ghost Mice!
- Saw Wheel
- Rumbleseat ( who has a great bob dylan moonshiner cover )

They sounds pretty fuckin' good.

So I woke up today and I just had this feeling in the deepest pit of my stomach that today wasn't going to be a good one. Something weird is going to happen? Theres a party tonight at Juans house, and I can't even begin to think of ALL the things that COULD go wrong tonight, but i think if I did i would drive myself insane. I have remember to stick to what i believe in. Don't live in fear, this day could be your last, live life to the fullest. So with that being said. FUCK YOU.. gross feeling in the pit of my stomach. Your not holding me back today.

Tonight Were Kings.

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(no subject)

[Jul. 24th, 2006|06:24 pm]

[	Current Mood	\|	curious	]
[	Current Music	\|	Jim Cramer Fuck Ass	]

I'm just not sure anymore... Relationships? Yes or No? Although one has not been presented infront of me, i'm not sure how i feel about them right about now. Do i want one, or am I feeling this way because there is something else is my life making me have this empty feeling. Have I not grown close to anyone because I have this invisible sheild up for my own protection, and if so how do i get rid of it? Sometimes it seems that more then anything i want someone that i can call my own, and snuggle up to when i need some comphort in life. I want someone to listen to songs with before our eyes shut and we fall into a dream filled sleep. Songs would seem to be the only way besides actions to express what the other makes me feel. Idk .... it seems great but then i would be giving up for much. Perhaps though, when that person comes along, it will be worth it to give up all the fun I've been having being free of commitment. Who knows. This is probably a subject i should not have any worry about until the time comes when it actully matters.

Pfft. Jim Cramer. Boo Yah Mother Fucker!

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